Thursday, March 02, 2006

Simon Doonan loves him some large black ladies

Simon Doonan, the glamorous varmint that writes books and appears on VH1 when he's not on his day job as creative director at Barneys just loves him some large black ladies. His sudden outburst of admiration was inspired by the woman he describes as "My American Idol", Idol contestant Mandisa Hundley.

What is it about large black ladies that makes them so compelling? Why do we, straight and gay alike, derive such good vibrations from their big cuddly selves? Here's my theory: We love big black chicks because they are genuinely comfortable with their girth. Their heapin' helpins of joyous self-acceptance are universally attractive. All that jolly self-esteem is positively contagious. It's the opposite of the depressing I'm-never-thin-enough wretched self-hatred that emanates from Hollywood white ladies.

Hollywood loves the ladies too -- as long as they're in drag. A funny take from Defamer:

1. Tyler Perry's Madea's Family Reunion $30.25 million

In the past month, movies centering around popular black funnymen in muumuus and fat suits have grossed about $95 million at the box office. Why do we get the feeling that as we sit here sipping our coffee, half of CAA is gathered in a conference room soberly discussing how to convince Will Smith to do Mrs. Doubtfire II, then drawing straws to break the news to Robin Williams?

I hear Dave Chappelle stopped returning calls.


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